Did your spouse cheat on you with an extramarital relationship? And you are still with your spouse? Believe me, you are not the only one. You stayed for a reason. So did the others.
An affair is not the end of this world when you look at the long run. You might have children to take care of. Your emotional bond could really mean something to both of you. You forgave your spouse. Or you just pretended that you forgave. Whatever it is, let’s check out what made them cheat.
Of course, there is no doubt that an infidelity is an act of betrayal. But there could be reasonable points. At least to consider when forgiving, because your marriage is more important to you.
You would never get an answer for this if you just ask this question from your spouse. But there are hundreds of reasons which can make somebody cheat in a marriage. These are the most common reasons in general.
01. Feeling unloved and unimportant.
It is normal that the butterflies you had when you first met each other, don’t survive anymore. But marriage means something more. Your partner has probably got carried away with the absence of butterflies and sparks. The attention he/she used to get in the beginning has faded away. Maybe he/she didn’t observe any gestures of love lately. Or you might have ignored his/her gestures of love or efforts.
02. Being in emotional pain or depression.
Your partner might have been going through a lot of pain without your support. Maybe he/she didn’t want to trouble you or didn’t want you to get affected with his/her worry. But the depression might have taken him/her to a new scope. This doesn’t mean it is reasonable. Not at all. But could be how it just happened all of a sudden.
The worst reason which you wouldn’t want to admit. Temptation happens when there is an opportunity. Your ignorance on your spouse could be the reason behind the opportunity, not all the time unless he/she is a habitual liar.
Whatever the reason it is, infidelity lies between lies, big and small. One small, opportunistic moment might have started everything out of nowhere. Whether those affairs mean something to them or not, it really meant something to your marriage. It did a lot of harm to your family.
But what is important to know is the importance of your relationship/ marriage to you. The importance of him/her to you. Infidelity should not be the end of a relationship all the time.
If you and your spouse believe it is worth fighting for, your relationship will surely find its way back. But this healing will need extra honesty, effort, and self-control.